Good day, my faithful few! Crawlers, how’s it going? It’s a whole year later now and I know the blog name used to be different but guess what?
That’s right. I do what I want. Plus, I wrote this over the weekend because time is precious during weekdays. Which is why I save it for naps. Okay, I didn’t nap for a whole year but I did get lazy. I know what you’re thinking, reader. Don’t you plan your posts in advance, weirdo? HA. No. I live on the edge. Just ask Steve. My posts don’t even have to have a point. I can say random things. I’m listening to Everything is Awesome by Tegan and Sara ft. The Lonely Island right now. Yes, from the Lego Movie soundtrack. Don’t pretend it’s not your jam.
I kid you, of course, dear internet user. This post does have a point. As Steve well knows, I have a history of unpopular opinions. For example, Steve believes that X-Men: First Class was a great movie. This, however, is a dirty lie. There were so many things wrong with that movie and Steve is going to have to accept that. We’ve already had a huge fight about it. I eventually got tired of screaming about the film’s faults to the dial tone. And if the sudden absence of angry breathing on all my phone calls is any indication, Steve got tired of fighting about it too. As a member of the faithful few (the time, date and manner of your official induction is yet to be determined), you will experience many levels of enlightenment. All of this is possible only because of my opinions, obviously, which as I have established are unpopular but only because they are correct.
I’m just messing with you. Mostly. I can totally take criticism. Like that time I took a sketching class and my teacher told me my work wasn’t powerful enough for the class exhibition, so I just quit. Didn’t even get my stupid certificate. I totally took her criticism, listened to it, decided to ignore it and abandoned all forms of art for the next five years. All I’m saying is, don’t get mad at me just because I’m right and you’re wrong but do leave a comment because Steve is giving me the silent treatment and I get lonely.